|May 21, 2020|
It is mind-bending how one word has intense, widespread meaning. Words have always mattered to me. Whether written or spoken, the words we choose can heal, harm, or hurt.
Living and just existing lately has been a wacky, unpredictable ride. It is exhausting and nerve-wracking to navigate this “new normal.” Well, speaking of language, what on earth IS normal anyway? If you have the answer, kindly let me know!
The word that’s flitting around my head incessantly is judgment. It’s like a pesky, persistent gnat on a humid Florida afternoon. It will not quit. It will not leave. And that’s when I decided this concept must be discussed.
Can you believe there’s ongoing debate about how to spell the word judgment? The current, common choice is without the “e.” But it is not wrong to write “judgement,” either.
It is a natural human response to judge. We have free will, individual thoughts, and experiences that influence how we see the world. I encourage you to pause and observe your thoughts, feelings, and words.
How do you speak to yourself? I do not perceive myself as a judgmental person. Yet I’ve caught myself lately; I’ve had uncharacteristically judgy-ish thoughts.
And then I judged myself! 🤦🏻♀️ Our inner dialogues deeply impact us. If we aren’t aware of how we speak to ourselves, how can we be mindful of not judging others?
I am definitely opinionated. I’ll own that wholeheartedly! I am keenly aware of not offering my opinion unless asked. Opinions have a different energy than judgements. Why? Individual perspectives on an issue/topic is an opinion.
Judgment is crafting an opinion and imposing it on another person. One can have good judgment but be judgmental. We can even have an opinion how the word judge is used!
To be honest, I’ve been struggling recently with judgements and opinions. I think so much of a message is the way in which we say it. The energy we hold.
Are we coming from a place of compassion or control? Are we communicating with kindness and acceptance? Or, are we being narrow minded; a “my way or the highway” vibe.
“I never judge anyone.” That sentence, or those that include “should” or “would,” direct us toward judgment street. We can have opinions but stay in our own lanes.
I often hear Todd and Zoe use the phrase “don’t judge.” I love it. I believe it. And it is how we try to live in our home. Adults ought to learn from the kids. I am deeply concerned about divisiveness and diatribes.
Covid has inflamed areas that extend beyond infecting our bodies. Perhaps we need to consider quarantining our judgments against ourselves and others.
Judgment and judging is jumping to conclusions. It is imposing our viewpoints, and often unsolicited, on someone else. The phrases “I would never” and “you should do…” are two that trigger my “don’t judge me” button! What are yours?
I”d like to challenge you to take this pandemic and shift it from Corona shaming to compassion and acceptance. Words matter. I encourage you this week to pause before speaking and consider, “Is this an opinion or judgment.
Will what I say hurt?” Try to shift what may become a judgment to “in my opinion” or “if it were me…” Instead of using “should” or “should not,” try softening your language.
I encourage you to think before speaking, texting, or emailing. You do have a choice. You do have free will. And you can choose kindness, empathy, and compassion. Or, you can choose to judge. The choice is yours.
Although we’re all experiencing detours, our journeys and how we navigate them are not the same. Each of us has individual challenges, fears, and experiences that influence how we may or may not act.
Most people are doing the best they can. Maybe it is all they’ve got right now. I ask you to consider this: Judge less and love more.
From my heart to yours,